20 HOURS Lost and Found @ Montreal Comic Con

Red Ronin | 18 September 2012 | 3 Comments   

 

Chester Carmichael Junior’s Montreal Comic Con 2012 Recap

It felt like I’d been waiting for this event my entire life, and since I go every year, I wasn’t quite sure why. Standing inside, by my lonesome, I found out. What I saw was nothing less than a vision. She was a cherub-faced feline, an angelic femme-fatale, an incarnation of perfection so rare and sought after that the very possibility of her existence seemed unimaginable and the likelihood of her having been created for any other purpose than my joy was outright impossible. So with that in mind, I approached, with caution of course, because the best laid traps always have the sweetest bait.

I had never been more afraid in my entire life. My palms were sweaty, my throat was tight and my pants were even tighter. The lack of blood flow to my brain must have acted as an uninhibiter. It reminded me of the time I was invited to a party and imbibed a citrus flavored cooler before stepping inside, my head was spinning. Channeling the spirit of Arthur Fonzarelli (for cool factor) and Logan (for strength) I decided to get her attention. With a quick whiff of her hair, she was mine.

Her name is Shantel Knight and together we took Montreal’s 2012 Comicon by storm, we made it ours, and soon, she will be mine…

We were surrounded by thousands of people, elves, creepers, warriors, robots super-heroes and super-villains. For three straight days I felt like I’d found El Dorado.

On the first day we met and interviewed creators, fans, and lovers of fantasy, fiction, pop-culture and comic books. It was amazing! I met some very, very, pretty ladies. The super-villain girl from Heroes of the North fell for me, but her boyfriend wasn’t having it. Shantel and I even shared some stiff drinks, and believe you me, they worked, I’d never been stiffer.

Day two took a very dark turn.

Tom Savini tried to steal my girl from me. He wanted her so bad he choked me half to death. I was later told I flat-lined for a full 30 seconds and the emergency medical staff had to use a defibrillator to knock me back to life…

Then I met Malcolm McDowell. I cried soon thereafter… I was so nervous I was wetting myself a little. You know, when you’re really, really, nervous and you kind of pee little, tiny, almost imperceptible drops? Well had that been the case, believe you me, the interview might have turned out a whole lot better. I mean, what d’you say to Malcolm McDowell that he hasn’t heard before? This man’s been on the scene and in the game for ages! He was in Party of Five for crying out loud!

I decided to ask him who his favorite movie villains were. His ice blue eyes looked deep into my soul and my heart stopped for a second. He must have knocked the wind out of me because when he said James Cagney, I made a face. He asked me if I knew who James Cagney was with that thick East London patois of his and I froze. Was it the “you dirty rat guy” they talk about in Ninja Turtles? Was it the short big eyed guy from The Maltese Falcon?  Which black and white, later 30 something, mobster genre specific, white male from the pre-war American golden age of films was he talking about? I froze and what followed was five of the most awkward minutes of my life (which is saying a lot). He told me to go away. I wet myself for the last time of the day, and I kindly obliged…

We were later told that he’d been deriding us to his cronies all day. They actually black listed us from the event… my heart sank. I was on the verge of tears, and then something happened. An event so monumental, so earth shatteringly inspiring that I almost can’t put it into words and do it justice…

Sir Patrick Stewart gave me a look. He was sitting there eating his sandwich and he gave me a look!! And then to further increase my joygasm William Shatner and John De Lancie, a.k.a. Q, were right next to him. They were talking and laughing and I swear to God, I was close enough to smell them. And they smelled like heroes, they smelled like gods, I had entered a pantheon of wise and ancient immortals. I could’ve died right then and there…

Day 3 brought me even more joy. Shantel Knight wearing a fitted latex suit courtesy of the Poison Candy Latex We walked around all day, flirting and conducting interviews. We were like Bonnie and Clyde, only cooler!  My joy was short lived however, due to the fact that she was whisked away by a latex clad, red headed, Amazon at the end of the day. My hopes of a night cap shattered, all I could do was dream. Feeling the heart ache of a man who’d flown too close to the sun and now plummets towards the tumultuous sea, I wept. I was inconsolable for at least an hour. Just a blithering mass of geek tears, nerd rage and fanboy awe.

As security was forcibly removing me from the premises due to the closing of festivities, the fates chose to smile upon me one last time…

 Years ago I was introduced to the X-Men’s comic universe through the Age of Apocalypse series. I’d read the entire collection of the Golden Edition Age of Apocalypse. It was mind bending. Since then, I’d always kept my eye out for the final pieces. I was missing X-Men Omega, I was missing, the Weapon X series, I was missing Gambit and the X-ternals… I’d lost all hope somewhere around the turn of the millennium. But on that last day of comicon, as the sun set on a life changing event, it happened. A collector was closing up shop, and that’s when I spotted them. Like a golden holy grail, shining in a beam of light, the entire collection was just sitting there. Seeing that I’d been crying all day, the collector made me a deal, and I bought the collection and the Killing Joke for an incredible price.

 The day was done, but despite it all, I had come out victorious and hopeful for the future. It turns out your boy Chester might be okay after all. Finding the long lost comics to round out my collection really inspired hope. And I learned something from it. You might not always get what you want when you want it, but if you fight hard enough, if you hope strong enough, and if you try consistently enough, sometimes dreams do come true. And so now I can move forward through life with a new purpose… Being the father of Shantel Knights children. For just like those comic books who escaped my fingers when I wanted them most, I will spot her some day, and when I do, she will be mine…